dragojustine: (Hate right now)
[personal profile] dragojustine
Oh my god you guys. My life sucks and I want to cry.

Yesterday there was a big windstorm. The power went out three times. About six hours after it went out the last time, the computer died. Just abruptly stopped- didn't churn, didn't freeze the way freezes normally look, wasn't in the middle of anything demanding- just, like flipping a switch, I lost all input from keyboard and mouse and the computer clock stopped and it was just STOPPED. After hard reboot, it was fine... for ten minutes. Then it stopped again.

I took it in to Best Buy and you GUYS. For TWO HUNDRED BUCKS they will figure out what is wrong with it, and, if software, fix it. If hardware, they will call me with estimate. If it's the motherboard, they're gonna recommend I buy a new computer.

I am about 95% sure it's hardware, and about 50% sure it's the motherboard, and I CANNOT AFFORD THAT. I can't even afford the two hundred plus tax. I really can't afford the parts if it's hardware they can replace. And there is just NO WAY IN HELL I can afford a new even half-decent computer. In the meantime, I am without a computer until the thirteenth... and possibly much longer. I have used up my entire margin of savings from last month that was supposed to go to my car insurance. And I need a doctor's appointment which I now really, really can't afford. (Naturally, between fixing my computer and going to the doctor... well, which would you pick?)

Plus I do not have a recent backup. I mean, all my work stuff is backed up, and all my writing is backed up, and all my video and music is backed up. But I was just doing the rundown of other stuff it will be so annoying to lose- old school work and some photos, basically, until I remembered that I have no backup for my icon folder. Three hundred icons I will never find again, only a ninety-something of which are uploaded now. Is it weird, that that's what I would be most pissed to lose? Or does that just mean I have good backup habits about the important stuff? That said, they offered to back me up first for $100, and good GOD do I not have $100 to back up three hundred userpics, fifty photos, and a zip file of undergrad history papers. Not when I don't have $100 to go to the doctor.

The thing that infuriates me is that if I were still living with Dustin, I would have already popped this hard drive into another computer and backed up everything I wanted myself. And popped a different drive into this computer just to make sure it is a hardware thing. If I had any good friends here in Texas, I would have already done the same thing. It's funny. A computer with internet access makes me feel so self-sufficient and so connected and so surrouned by friends- it's startling and disconcerting and even a little frightening to realize how completely and utterly alone I am here without it.

So I have no computer until the thirteenth, and internet access only in 30 minute chunks, twenty minutes away from home, during business hours, after waiting in line. And I do all my business over email, which means I will have to drive out to this library something like four times a day and I hate my life.

I flirted with the Geek Squad guy like you wouldn't believe. It was all reflexive, too; he was taking away my baby and I felt helpless and desperate and at his mercy and sure enough, that flipped my eyelash-batting circuits. I've always been rather baffled and dismissive of women who reflexively flirt with cops who pull them over, but now it turns out I am one of those women, given a rather different stimulus. We chatted about Chuck and how I'd been thinking of it as the Nerd Herd the whole time I was waiting in line and he said they get that a lot now and I told him he was pretty much as cute as Chuck Bartowski so that's okay. And then he blushed. In my own defense, he was; tall lanky redhead with a really big grin. But still. I was reflexively flirting (badly; that's the only way I know how) and oh for God's sake. But I was giving him my computer!

So that Daniel/Jack/Paul fic I promised? Not coming. The moebius fic? Not coming. The Kings fic? Not coming.

On the plus side, I just picked up the next Bujold book, and let me tell you, it looks hilarious. The back says, "You might thing that an obstetrician on a planet forbidden to women would be underemployed..." The cover art is the most horrible lurid SF pulp looking thing I've seen in a long time. I am reading this on pure faith in Bujold, because it looks like badfic of the highest calibre. Then again, that might be what I need, given that I am stranded utterly alone in a strange city with no computer and no money. But after Cetaganda Bujold pretty much owns me, so.
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dragojustine

December 2020

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