Thought on squick and SPN reactioney
Feb. 22nd, 2008 07:31 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dragojustineBefore I get to SPN, I really would kind of like people's input on this:
So it's pretty common to say that SPN fandom does away with all your squicks. (hell, I just massively enjoyed![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
lazy_daze watersports. So, huh.) But it turns out I have some left. You see, I just read this fic. Dom pulls out a knife. Sub, restrained, safewords. Dom does not stop.
The caveats are: I read this fic because I once liked this author, many many years ago (literally years). I do not know the fandom or the characters involved (SGA John/Rodney, if that helps anybody). I am VERY hesitant to criticize fic where I don't know the characters, you know?
That said, the whole fic was very clearly about trust. A trust issue prompted the knife in the first place, and the fic continues- after that ignored safeword- with the sub completely panicking but then eventually coming around to trust, to feel like he got taught some sort of lesson about trusting said Dom. A lesson he deserved.
I have no words for how much that squicks me. If I were in this fandom, I seriously would have responded to the fic- in the nicest, most polite way possible, with complimentary words about her character voices and banter to start, as non-confrontational as possible. I still have the urge to do that, but I'm suppressing it.
The thing is, I can totally get off on non-con. For that matter, I know I've read more than a few fics with inexperienced people playing around with D/s dynamics with no real safeguards and ending up in that kind of panic situation- and those have been hot too.
Questions- Why does this ping me so much worse? Why can I completely love fic with any amount of crazily kinky stuff, but completely flip out at this (where, frankly, nobody gets cut and nothing beyond the symbolic really happens)? Is that weird? Does anyone else have similar reactions? Is this gut reaction I'm feeling even the same thing as what we normally mean by squick? Should I leave an (excruciatingly polite!) comment? (don't worry, I'm sane enough to be leaning to 'no' on that one)
It seems that all I have done in this journal for the last three weeks is FLAIL about MY SHOW. This week was is little less flail-y, mostly because of the Big Thing that everybody is talking about, but I did still love it.
1. Over the course of this season I have gone from cringing at the idea of Bela to loving her so much that I descend into flappy-handed squee whenever she interacts with our boys. However, my love for her is very specific and conditional: do NOT let her have a horrible sad story. It is okay if she stole the Colt for non-profit-motives, but do NOT make her a great noble misunderstood warrior. And for the love of all that is holy, do NOT make her really on Lilith's side. She is a great character, writers- don't fuck this up!
2. Way to hit my competence kink, show. Dean with a bandolier! Sam kicking ass! Lots and lots of tossing and loading and handling and shooting of guns by very hot competent men! Super-Latin-Sammy! I forget how much I LOVE it when our boys are actually allowed to be GOOD at what they do.
3. Okay, where is the Dean/Nancy "we're all going to die" desperation first-time? Also, where is the Dean/Henricksen? Come on, fandom, service me!
4. When Henricksen implied John sexually abused Dean... I found that interesting, that they went there, but it completely makes sense as a conclusion (or at least a theory) that Henricksen would come to, after all the time he's spent trying to get his head around the Winchester's psychology. Hell, it's a conclusion a lot of fandom came to about a POSSIBLE side (even though not the one I believe in canon) of Dean and John's relationship and how Dean ended up How He Is. I really loved this little moment- the way both boys reacted to it, Dean so subtly and Sam so not. It... hit buttons for me. Plus, Dean's "you don't know crap about my dad" in Nightshifter is in my top five favorite moments in the ENTIRE SERIES. It's a little moment that I can hardly even think about without tearing up and melting in love and empathy for Dean. So this little callback to that moment just... yeah.
5. The conversation between Dean and Henricksen is one of the very best scenes I can remember on this show. Everything about their conversation- The evil clowns and bigfoot joke, Henricksen's reaction to that, Henricksen's frustration at the waste of all his efforts. Most of all, Dean's conception of himself "going down swinging." It's SO CLICHE except it's also SO UTTERLY PERFECT for Dean- just exactly how he would conceptualize himself, you know? Exactly the way he would put value on his life and heroic death at that particular moment- one of those little gems of truly FANTASTIC character writing dressed up as purely normal dialog.
Speaking of which, that moment when Henricksen says "you've got nothing to go home to but your brother" Dean has this look, for just a moment... "Yes, and?" It's all very oh, Dean... because, while we know that he DOES want more at least subconsciously, for Dean the very fact that he HAS Sam to come home to is his great victory and his validation and what he's given everything for. It doesn't occur to Dean to understand that as not enough, as a failure or something to be regretted the way Henricksen does. It takes him a second, it really seriously takes him a second, to understand how Henricksen could mean this as a BAD thing. oh, Dean.
Now the slightly more contentious issues (and some linkage from elsewhere).
1. "But you didn't shoot the deputy": Brilliantly funny or horribly crass? Or, given that it was horribly crass, brilliantly in character for Dean or too crass even for him?dodger_winslow goes into that in a very good ep reactioney. I do not know. HOWEVER, did you watch Dean's face for that line? He thinks of the joke, almost says it, PAUSES, almost doesn't say it, then very visibly thinks, "aw, hell with it," and says it anyway. I do not know if this is more crass or less crass than if he'd just blurted it out. What I do know is that it makes me want to grab Jensen and just TWIRL him for being SO DAMNED GOOD at what he does.
Speaking of wanting to twirl Jensen, we got to see him in a t-shirt with one sleeve torn off. Hell with the bullet hole, that is one sexy shoulder. *ahem* Right, being serious here.
2.nilchance meta'd about sexism but it's under an flock. poisontaster has been doing some very good feminism meta here and here. I get the issues, but frankly I LIKED Nancy. I think the gender issues in this episode don't even register compared to the horror that was Malleus Maleficarum, which is faint praise, but moving on.
3. Sam's character development. Many people have commented on the irony here- Jus in Bello works INCREDIBLY well as a follow-up to Mystery Spot, with the very real consequences of Sam's three months living feral. His reaction to the sacrifice idea is miles beyond what it would have been before Mystery Spot, and that progression makes me so happy....
And the you sit back and realize that this was suppose to air before Mystery Spot *facepalm* Well, this is the order it aired in, this is canonical, and I love Sam's character progression even if it did happen by serendipity instead of intent.
4. And, we can't put off mentioning SPN's skanky race issues any longer.musesfool does it here. *sigh* Henricksen was MADE of AWESOME in this episode. He was so wonderful, and the script really banged home the reason I loved him most, which was that he was SO LIKE DEAN. I babbled at hugely embarrassing length at Wincon about how I love Henricksen as a flipside of Dean, a what-if for Dean, an alternate protagonist who can completely invert the way we watch our show, if only for a little while.
(Random tiny note: I found the moment when the FBI big-shot refused to shake Henricksen's hand to be very interesting, in a show so apparently oblivious about its own issues.)
Anyway, I am SO HAPPY with Henricksen as a character and just incredibly pissed as his death- both for the loss of HIM, in particular, and for the icky can't-a-black-man-ever-survive.
So it's pretty common to say that SPN fandom does away with all your squicks. (hell, I just massively enjoyed
lazy_daze watersports. So, huh.) But it turns out I have some left. You see, I just read this fic. Dom pulls out a knife. Sub, restrained, safewords. Dom does not stop.The caveats are: I read this fic because I once liked this author, many many years ago (literally years). I do not know the fandom or the characters involved (SGA John/Rodney, if that helps anybody). I am VERY hesitant to criticize fic where I don't know the characters, you know?
That said, the whole fic was very clearly about trust. A trust issue prompted the knife in the first place, and the fic continues- after that ignored safeword- with the sub completely panicking but then eventually coming around to trust, to feel like he got taught some sort of lesson about trusting said Dom. A lesson he deserved.
I have no words for how much that squicks me. If I were in this fandom, I seriously would have responded to the fic- in the nicest, most polite way possible, with complimentary words about her character voices and banter to start, as non-confrontational as possible. I still have the urge to do that, but I'm suppressing it.
The thing is, I can totally get off on non-con. For that matter, I know I've read more than a few fics with inexperienced people playing around with D/s dynamics with no real safeguards and ending up in that kind of panic situation- and those have been hot too.
Questions- Why does this ping me so much worse? Why can I completely love fic with any amount of crazily kinky stuff, but completely flip out at this (where, frankly, nobody gets cut and nothing beyond the symbolic really happens)? Is that weird? Does anyone else have similar reactions? Is this gut reaction I'm feeling even the same thing as what we normally mean by squick? Should I leave an (excruciatingly polite!) comment? (don't worry, I'm sane enough to be leaning to 'no' on that one)
It seems that all I have done in this journal for the last three weeks is FLAIL about MY SHOW. This week was is little less flail-y, mostly because of the Big Thing that everybody is talking about, but I did still love it.
1. Over the course of this season I have gone from cringing at the idea of Bela to loving her so much that I descend into flappy-handed squee whenever she interacts with our boys. However, my love for her is very specific and conditional: do NOT let her have a horrible sad story. It is okay if she stole the Colt for non-profit-motives, but do NOT make her a great noble misunderstood warrior. And for the love of all that is holy, do NOT make her really on Lilith's side. She is a great character, writers- don't fuck this up!
2. Way to hit my competence kink, show. Dean with a bandolier! Sam kicking ass! Lots and lots of tossing and loading and handling and shooting of guns by very hot competent men! Super-Latin-Sammy! I forget how much I LOVE it when our boys are actually allowed to be GOOD at what they do.
3. Okay, where is the Dean/Nancy "we're all going to die" desperation first-time? Also, where is the Dean/Henricksen? Come on, fandom, service me!
4. When Henricksen implied John sexually abused Dean... I found that interesting, that they went there, but it completely makes sense as a conclusion (or at least a theory) that Henricksen would come to, after all the time he's spent trying to get his head around the Winchester's psychology. Hell, it's a conclusion a lot of fandom came to about a POSSIBLE side (even though not the one I believe in canon) of Dean and John's relationship and how Dean ended up How He Is. I really loved this little moment- the way both boys reacted to it, Dean so subtly and Sam so not. It... hit buttons for me. Plus, Dean's "you don't know crap about my dad" in Nightshifter is in my top five favorite moments in the ENTIRE SERIES. It's a little moment that I can hardly even think about without tearing up and melting in love and empathy for Dean. So this little callback to that moment just... yeah.
5. The conversation between Dean and Henricksen is one of the very best scenes I can remember on this show. Everything about their conversation- The evil clowns and bigfoot joke, Henricksen's reaction to that, Henricksen's frustration at the waste of all his efforts. Most of all, Dean's conception of himself "going down swinging." It's SO CLICHE except it's also SO UTTERLY PERFECT for Dean- just exactly how he would conceptualize himself, you know? Exactly the way he would put value on his life and heroic death at that particular moment- one of those little gems of truly FANTASTIC character writing dressed up as purely normal dialog.
Speaking of which, that moment when Henricksen says "you've got nothing to go home to but your brother" Dean has this look, for just a moment... "Yes, and?" It's all very oh, Dean... because, while we know that he DOES want more at least subconsciously, for Dean the very fact that he HAS Sam to come home to is his great victory and his validation and what he's given everything for. It doesn't occur to Dean to understand that as not enough, as a failure or something to be regretted the way Henricksen does. It takes him a second, it really seriously takes him a second, to understand how Henricksen could mean this as a BAD thing. oh, Dean.
Now the slightly more contentious issues (and some linkage from elsewhere).
1. "But you didn't shoot the deputy": Brilliantly funny or horribly crass? Or, given that it was horribly crass, brilliantly in character for Dean or too crass even for him?
dodger_winslow goes into that in a very good ep reactioney. I do not know. HOWEVER, did you watch Dean's face for that line? He thinks of the joke, almost says it, PAUSES, almost doesn't say it, then very visibly thinks, "aw, hell with it," and says it anyway. I do not know if this is more crass or less crass than if he'd just blurted it out. What I do know is that it makes me want to grab Jensen and just TWIRL him for being SO DAMNED GOOD at what he does. Speaking of wanting to twirl Jensen, we got to see him in a t-shirt with one sleeve torn off. Hell with the bullet hole, that is one sexy shoulder. *ahem* Right, being serious here.
2.
nilchance meta'd about sexism but it's under an flock. poisontaster has been doing some very good feminism meta here and here. I get the issues, but frankly I LIKED Nancy. I think the gender issues in this episode don't even register compared to the horror that was Malleus Maleficarum, which is faint praise, but moving on. 3. Sam's character development. Many people have commented on the irony here- Jus in Bello works INCREDIBLY well as a follow-up to Mystery Spot, with the very real consequences of Sam's three months living feral. His reaction to the sacrifice idea is miles beyond what it would have been before Mystery Spot, and that progression makes me so happy....
And the you sit back and realize that this was suppose to air before Mystery Spot *facepalm* Well, this is the order it aired in, this is canonical, and I love Sam's character progression even if it did happen by serendipity instead of intent.
4. And, we can't put off mentioning SPN's skanky race issues any longer.
musesfool does it here. *sigh* Henricksen was MADE of AWESOME in this episode. He was so wonderful, and the script really banged home the reason I loved him most, which was that he was SO LIKE DEAN. I babbled at hugely embarrassing length at Wincon about how I love Henricksen as a flipside of Dean, a what-if for Dean, an alternate protagonist who can completely invert the way we watch our show, if only for a little while. (Random tiny note: I found the moment when the FBI big-shot refused to shake Henricksen's hand to be very interesting, in a show so apparently oblivious about its own issues.)
Anyway, I am SO HAPPY with Henricksen as a character and just incredibly pissed as his death- both for the loss of HIM, in particular, and for the icky can't-a-black-man-ever-survive.