dragojustine (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
dragojustine) wrote2007-12-14 09:55 pm
dragojustine) wrote2007-12-14 09:55 pm
Entry tags:
- life,
- life: angst,
- porn,
- rps,
- tv: heroes
Use the porn to combat the angst. That's my general strategy.
Only 8 more days till I go home for Christmas!
Successful days of writing: 15
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
technosage is hosting an Any-fandom Porn-paragraph-a-thon which has had tons of awesome stuff written in it already. I porned, completely failing the whole "paragraph" idea:
Heroes, Adam/Peter, walls
RPS, JDM/Jensen, daddykink
The party was exactly as I expected it to be, which is to say hellish. Not only for my anti-social social-phobia party-avoidance reasons, but also for my crappy-relationship bitter-and-resentful issues. Bleh.
On the frivolous side, I had to buy lipstick. I have this... habit, I guess, of licking/chewing on/generally worrying at my lips a lot, such that I have never had any lipstick that has stayed visible for more than 20 minutes (literally). Which is why I never bother with it. But I needed some last night, so I went and bought some of that Revlon Color Stay stuff that says ludicrous things like "12-hour wear!" in the ads. I took it home and tried it out to see the color. Okay, good color. Then I went away and drank and ate. And then I brushed my teeth. Then, an hour later, I went to go get ready for the party and... still there! And looking perfect. So I went to the party, and drank, and ate, and kissed. And came home and brushed my teeth again and washed my face. And went to bed. And then work up 7 hours later, went in to take a shower... and I STILL had perfect plum colored lips!
I'm a little frightened of my lipstick now.
I had this long babble about dressing up as a girl, with skirts and blow-dried hair and lipstick and heels and crap, and how fake and performative it feels to me and how I used to love it and now I hate it and I MISS loving it and it's all tied up with my current self-esteem and relationship issues and I hate that a man has the power to even make me hate wearing skirts now and... then I decided that was way more than anyone could conceivably want to know about my sexual issues.
Successful days of writing: 15
technosage is hosting an Any-fandom Porn-paragraph-a-thon which has had tons of awesome stuff written in it already. I porned, completely failing the whole "paragraph" idea: Heroes, Adam/Peter, walls
RPS, JDM/Jensen, daddykink
The party was exactly as I expected it to be, which is to say hellish. Not only for my anti-social social-phobia party-avoidance reasons, but also for my crappy-relationship bitter-and-resentful issues. Bleh.
On the frivolous side, I had to buy lipstick. I have this... habit, I guess, of licking/chewing on/generally worrying at my lips a lot, such that I have never had any lipstick that has stayed visible for more than 20 minutes (literally). Which is why I never bother with it. But I needed some last night, so I went and bought some of that Revlon Color Stay stuff that says ludicrous things like "12-hour wear!" in the ads. I took it home and tried it out to see the color. Okay, good color. Then I went away and drank and ate. And then I brushed my teeth. Then, an hour later, I went to go get ready for the party and... still there! And looking perfect. So I went to the party, and drank, and ate, and kissed. And came home and brushed my teeth again and washed my face. And went to bed. And then work up 7 hours later, went in to take a shower... and I STILL had perfect plum colored lips!
I'm a little frightened of my lipstick now.
I had this long babble about dressing up as a girl, with skirts and blow-dried hair and lipstick and heels and crap, and how fake and performative it feels to me and how I used to love it and now I hate it and I MISS loving it and it's all tied up with my current self-esteem and relationship issues and I hate that a man has the power to even make me hate wearing skirts now and... then I decided that was way more than anyone could conceivably want to know about my sexual issues.