dragojustine (
dragojustine) wrote2010-08-25 05:40 pm
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It's nice to finally discover your role in life...
So CB, my cousin who has no affiliation with my school but just moved here for a job at the same time I did, has a crush on D, who sits directly behind me in class. They're both Mormon, you see, and met independent of me at a church new-to-town meet and greet. I believe they call this a Big City Coincidence. Either that or a sitcom plot.
She wants me to do detective work for her. I was able to confirm that he went to BYU and wears a CTR ring, but she wants more. More? Well... I can tell you everything you want to know about his opinions on early 20th century railroad worker injury caselaw?
She wasn't appeased.
Of course, it then turned out that S, the closest thing I've made to a friend actually at this school, is sleeping with the Other S, the guy who I was working up to asking out. Except it might not be going so well and she wants me to do some buffer duty between them.
Then I went out to the Soup Nazi store. On the way home, I overheard a truly surreal, indecipherable-out-of-context conversation on the subway.
When I got back to my place, there were a couple people sitting out on the metal fire escape chatting and smoking and spying on their neighbors. They waved to me.
I have reached the completely inarguable conclusion: I am a recurring character on Friends.
I don't think there's any other explanation.
(Aside: Freshdirect.com is a wonderful, wonderful company and I want to spread their gospel far and wide. That said, they apparently sometimes surprise their customers with "today's free peak produce." I now have a... Thing, by appearance perhaps some member of the melon family, larger than my head, sitting on my kitchen counter. I'm a little creeped out by it. The surreality of my life only increases.)
She wants me to do detective work for her. I was able to confirm that he went to BYU and wears a CTR ring, but she wants more. More? Well... I can tell you everything you want to know about his opinions on early 20th century railroad worker injury caselaw?
She wasn't appeased.
Of course, it then turned out that S, the closest thing I've made to a friend actually at this school, is sleeping with the Other S, the guy who I was working up to asking out. Except it might not be going so well and she wants me to do some buffer duty between them.
Then I went out to the Soup Nazi store. On the way home, I overheard a truly surreal, indecipherable-out-of-context conversation on the subway.
When I got back to my place, there were a couple people sitting out on the metal fire escape chatting and smoking and spying on their neighbors. They waved to me.
I have reached the completely inarguable conclusion: I am a recurring character on Friends.
I don't think there's any other explanation.
(Aside: Freshdirect.com is a wonderful, wonderful company and I want to spread their gospel far and wide. That said, they apparently sometimes surprise their customers with "today's free peak produce." I now have a... Thing, by appearance perhaps some member of the melon family, larger than my head, sitting on my kitchen counter. I'm a little creeped out by it. The surreality of my life only increases.)
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(The first time I visited NY, a guy tried to sell me a knock-off watch. Had like thirty of them hanging from the inside of his coat and everything. New York is WEIRD. You sort of feel perpetually like you're an extra in something. Or is that just me?)
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